“Hi there, pussycat,”  I offered.  “Are there any good news?”

“Not a new”, said Slats.  “Anything new with you?”

 “Ayuh”, I answered.  “But I wish there wasn't.  Would you like to hear about it?”

 “I spose iffen I said 'No' you'd be mad at me, wouldn't ya?  Slats ventured.  “So go ahead, bend my ear.”  And to the bartender, “A glass of Maine's finest brew, if you please, my good man.  I've got a whistle badly in need of moisturizing.”

  “Okay, here goes.  You know which party runs the Maine State Legislature, doncha?”

“Sure do,” says Slats confidently.  “Same bunch as has been for the last umpteen years, ain't it?”

“Same bunch.  Well, are you ready for this?  The State Treasurer, David Lemoine, just invested $20,000,000.-that's 20 million bucks-of our tax money in “The Mainsail II” and lost it.”

“Whaddya mean, “lost it”?  How can you lose 20 million big ones of our tax dollars?
I mean, did it fall out of his wallet, or what?”

 “ No.  It's just that he made a bad investment.  But he said not to worry because Maine is meeting its investment goals for the present year.”

 “You mean to tell me that the State Treasurer can take our tax money, invest it in a losing proposition, and just pass it off by telling us taxpayers not to worry 'cause there's plenty left?  Doesn't he have any personal responsibility to invest state taxpayers' money only in things that are 100% safe?  And aren't these investments insured somehow so that if the Treasurer screws up, the insurance kicks in?  Are you telling me a state official who invests our money in a careless way or with an irresponsible banker or broker or whatever, and loses it, can just walk away? 

“ I'm not telling you anything.  I'm just telling you that the State Treasurer says he went to a financial adviser who advised him to invest the $20 mill in Mainsail II, which he did.

And lost it.”

“And exactly what is Mainsail II?  Sounds like someone's yacht?”

 “I think it might be a whole bunch of yachts, but it isn't.”

 “And he gets out of it scot-free? asks Slats.

“Apparently.  But he wants us all to know that the State of Maine will still be able to meet its obligations.  How comforting?  And it appears the State Treasurer has no official or personal obligation to make it good, or to go after the brokerage that sold him the bad investment, and have the court order that firm to make it good.  But we should all be comforted.”

“Oh.  And why pray tell?”

“Because the State Treasurer, David Lemoine, says he won't use that broker again.  And besides, the $20 million bucks is only about 3 percent of the state's cash pool.  Aren't you comforted?” 

“Not on your tintype, I ain't.” rages Slats.  And what in blue blazes is the blessed and sanctified Legislature doing about it and about the State Treasurer's expensive goof?”

 “Well, Richard Rosen, a senator from the other side of the aisle, naturally, introduced a bill to require the State Treasurer to invest only in the safest kinds of funds.” Now Slats is really angry.   He is shaking so hard he even spills a drop of the bubbly.

“Okay, okay.  And what happened to the bill?  Did it go sailing through, as it should have?”

“No.  Not exactly, old buddy.  It died last month.  Died a-borning, one might say.  The Legislature wants to have more time to think about it, I guess.  And besides…”

 “Besides what? Slats scowls.

“Besides, it's getting on toward election time, and we don't want to do anything that will stir up the voters too much.  Do we?  Well, do we?”

But Slats has slammed his glass down and is headed for the door.